Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.

Psalm‬ ‭42‬:‭5

Sobriety comes crashing into our lives leaving wreckage of its own. Our past is messy, but our newfound hope is not all roses.

On the heels of coming to—knowing we are on the correct path—we don’t always feel great.

The discontent of our life’s meanderings squeezes itself to the front of our minds with the hopeless assurance of white noise.

The effortless second-guessing of the severity of our blunders saunters up to us like a prostitute.

Thoughts like, “It wasn’t that bad,” becomes the new poison we sip on from time to time.

And they are all brought on by a slipping away of our focus, of our faith. If we’ve never had faith or even hope before, we really can experience whiplash during this time.

If we’ve had and lost faith, the sooner we acknowledge the extent of its disrepair, the sooner we can regain some steady footing.

But in either case, our anchor remains available.

The wreckage of the present is not going anywhere. We can hope in God even if we don’t feel like it by taking one step forward at a time. High-heeling over the crap that invites us to give up again.

God, help me let go but never give up.