Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you.

Psalm‬ ‭128‬:‭1‬-‭2

The fear of the Lord is an elusive component of sobriety…and usually of everyday living.

I don’t want God to be fearful. Yes, I simplify my perception of him when I think this way, but it is what most of us think when we get right down to it.

Wouldn’t it be easier and more manageable to have a God that was all love and no fear—all welcoming for all people?

Wouldn’t it be great if there weren’t any rules? Any boundaries? Can God break his own rules?

Look, the weeds are deep and the matter at hand is simple—when I derail from what’s actually written about God, I divide his divine-ness by my own understanding. The result is a moral ideal for my back pocket.

I don’t have to be a scholar to realize I don’t know everything, but I do accept that God is worthy to be feared. And not in an “I’m afraid of you smiting me” kind of way. In an awesome, “I can’t even comprehend you” kind of way.

Part of sobering up has been getting back in line. We enjoy cutting to the front and skipping what others have to wait for. But this isn’t the way.

Sobriety hasn’t cured me of wanting to be unique—we all are unique—but it had oriented me back to where my proper place in life is: as an individual contributor.

I’m not the manager of my own life. That’s not what we want to hear until we get to the end of trying in vain to manage it. Then it comes as sweet news indeed.

There is another way.

God, help me live under your guidance, accepting the awesome unknown.