Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

Matthew‬ ‭14‬:‭31

We’ve got the remarkable ability to begin doubting the very solution that has already begun to work in our lives.

Recovery programs and the twelve steps will in fact work on us whether or not we believe they are well founded or effective.

It doesn’t matter much what our perspective of them is.

It doesn’t matter that our faith is nonexistent in the beginning.

It doesn’t matter that we are more skeptical than hopeful.

What matters is that we’ve gathered enough willingness to put one foot in front of the other and actually follow some directions.

Willingness can come before hope.

As much as I hammer home the message of hope, it doesn’t come quickly for everyone.

Willingness can indeed open the door. And provided we walk through it by taking action, we can begin accruing the benefits of the steps before we even believe in them.

Different people will have different results here. But this concerted effort is in fact the first drops of what can become a wellspring of faith.

We must guard against the paralyzing doubt that constantly comes after us.

Being inexperienced with the sober life, being a bit frayed around the edges, our thoughts may persist in drawing us backward for a time.

This also is not to be feared but expected. The good news is that once our addiction has been arrested, we are given something we haven’t had in a while: choice.

We can choose to fall into our old ways. We can choose to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools.

We know where the first path leads. We’ve been there.

It’s the fear of the unknown that gives us pause, but with the willingness born out of bitter experience and the encouragement from new friends, we can now lean forward.

God help me lean forward in the right direction.