A dispute also arose among them, as to which of them was to be regarded as the greatest.

Luke‬ ‭22‬:‭24

Here, at a pivotal moment in history, after it was revealed someone would betray him, Jesus’ disciples digress into arguments of self-worth.

If these handpicked by God himself to be his faithful crew are by turns going to betray him outright and then fuss over who gets to ride shotgun, is it any wonder that we spend much of our own existence with our heads down, focused on all the wrong things?

I am often able to center myself and my priorities in the quiet of the morning—reading, praying, writing—but then the day kicks into gear and I’m off.

Where exactly am I off to, though? And why can’t I more often bring God along with me?

I devote a lot of thought and effort to the idea that He should be prioritized, but then I’m often left wondering whether I gave any time to spiritual thoughts throughout the bulk of my day.

I think two things are helpful:

1. Take action. Or keep taking it. Don’t be too discouraged. Lean into Him more and more. Find time to dedicate to focused meditation on Him. Do the work but don’t beat yourself up when you don’t do it perfectly.

2. Pray for the strength. We aren’t capable. No amount of self-rallying will “get us there”. We need to be intervened upon.

God, direct my thinking; pull it back when it falls away into bad places.