To this end we always pray for you, that our God may make you worthy of his calling and may fulfill every resolve for good and every work of faith by his power.

‭‭‭‭2 Thessalonians‬ ‭1‬:‭11

There are some counterintuitive parts to attaining and holding on to sobriety. The heart of this head spinner is the idea that our drinking and using was a symptom rather than a cause.

It’s easy to view the life that we had been living as the whole problem. That if we could put an end to the endless days of consumption that we’d straighten back out.

Sure, there would be a period of readjustment. But as uncomfortable as that would be, the sobriety on the other side would make up for it in satisfaction and freedom.

There is truth to this, but only one level deep. Addiction is more substantive than this. To chalk it up to simply stopping and carrying on with things is a play towards convenient ignorance.

A better starting point comes from AA’s literature: “our whole attitude and outlook toward life will change.”

Love for others, for God and for the tenuous life I can now cherish has become the foundation for each new day. I’ve found that despite the accumulation of knowledge about addiction, it is an ailment rooted in the heart.

Once I pry myself free from its grip, the real work begins.

Turning our backs on our own agendas is like pulling teeth. But the truth does set us free to pursue this drastic course of action.

The truth is that our own agendas, our selfishness, our self-centered mess was the fire our addictions fed.

God, help me not lose sight of the truth.