Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

Hebrews‬ ‭11‬:‭1

Few things do I mull over more than the idea of assurance. It somehow folds itself into most every area of my life. And I become fixated on the idea of certainty.

I want it. I want the solid rock of fact. And the backbone of proof.

Coming out of the fog of addiction, assurance becomes a lifeline until we find that much of what is offered as a way to permanent sanity lies in the ethereal realm of faith.

What is this jargon? What am I being sold? Didn’t I already pass these Sunday school lessons and glean what could be taken from them?

Indeed, the only attempts at facts are flimsy statistics of chances of true recovery in the population at large.

And in the hands of desperate laypeople, these stats are muddled and coerced to become either meager attempts at hope or scathing reports of despair.

Both interpretations lead me back to square one: I’m not getting any of the assurances I want. The way forward is through the painstaking act of faith.

And faith is an act. Time and again, we’ve heard the adage that faith without works is dead.

This is profoundly important to the addict who must take action to not return to active addiction. And must insulate himself with further action to guard against relapse or the insidious thoughts of relapse as more days are put between him and the last drink.

So, yes, we gain assurance through faith worked out by walking toward God, who we may even still take issue with.

But the walking toward Him, the seeking of Him, the inkling of faith in Him becomes enough to give us what we so needed: relief from bondage.

God, I’m still not sure sometimes; open my eyes.